A lesson I wish I’d learned earlier?
That saying yes when you mean no is the fastest way to hand over the steering wheel of your own life. And once someone else has their hands on it, good luck getting them to let go; they’ll happily drive you straight into their version of happiness, leaving yours in the dust.
I was late to learn that boundaries are not rude, they’re necessary. They’re not a barricade shutting the world out, they’re a filter. They let the good things through and keep the rot from creeping in. Trouble is, no one teaches you that as a kid. We’re spoon-fed “be polite,” “don’t cause a fuss,” “just go along.” Before you know it, you’re twenty, thirty, forty years old and running yourself ragged just to avoid disappointing people who barely think twice about disappointing you.
It took me too many years to figure out that people pleasing is like pouring your best wine into everyone else’s glass, then sitting with an empty cup yourself. And worse, half the people you’re filling up don’t even bother to toast you; they just drink and ask for more.
The rebellious truth? Most people respect you more when you draw a line in the sand and say, “Nope, not crossing that.” They might not like it at first (especially if they’ve been feasting on your energy for free), but the ones worth keeping around will adapt. And the ones who don’t? Well, let’s just say they were never really on your team.
So yes, if I could send a note back to my younger self, it would say: Don’t be so bloody accommodating. Learn the power of no, sooner rather than later. And don’t apologize for it either.
Because once you start saying no to what drains you, you finally have the space to say yes to what lights you up. And that, my friends, is where freedom begins.
Mae 🧡
UNDER THE WILL... OVER THE DRAMA... 
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