Episode 64 -Broadband and Bullies: A Lock-down Memory…

It was early 2020. The world was going into lock-down, banana bread was trending and I was outside trying to catch a bit of peace when he emerged. Let’s call him Bully. Because, well… you know.

He marched out like a storm cloud in sensible shoes – the farmer kind and launched into a tirade about the internet bill. Apparently, it was high. Why? Because I hadn’t downgraded it to a plan that didn’t even cost less, just offered less. (Because what everyone needs during a global pandemic is slower internet, right?)

Bully then proceeded to tell me I should be paying for my own internet. Interesting, considering I was living there unpaid, supporting our dad, who was showing clear signs of dementia before the diagnosis. No help from the family. The only income I had was from the government because, fun fact: unpaid caregivers don’t magically generate salaries from fairy dust.

But the cherry on this warped sundae?

‘You’re taking advantage of an old age pensioner!’

Yes. That’s what he said.

As he stood there, red in the face, bullying me, a woman not even drawing a pension yet, while I was caring for said pensioner, for free. And then he added, with that smug smirk:

‘Anyway, you’ll be on the pension soon yourself!’

Excuse me? I mean yes, technically we’re all ageing but I still dye my hair and can do the splits (on a good day). Let’s not write me off just yet, Bully.

So to recap:

Bully = bullying someone over a bill.

Me = unpaid caregiver.

Dad = being exploited, yes, but not by me.

Narcissist logic: 0, Reality: 1.

Real Talk: What is Narcissistic Projection?

When a narcissist accuses you of doing something awful, it’s often exactly what they’re doing themselves. This is called projection. It’s a sneaky way of shifting blame and confusing you, so you start defending yourself instead of holding them accountable.

If someone constantly accuses you of things that feel wildly off-base, it’s not your gut overreacting, it’s your gut trying to tell you the truth.

Lesson of the Day:

When a Narcissist Points a Finger… Check Who’s Holding the Mirror.

Narcissists love to accuse you of the very things they’re doing. It’s not because they’re confused, it’s because it works. You waste energy defending yourself while they keep doing damage in the background. So next time someone claims you’re the problem while they’re stomping around like a cranky toddler with a superiority complex, just smile and remember!

If the accusation feels upside-down, it probably is.