UNDER THE WILL… OVER THE DRAMA…

What I Wish I Knew…

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by

Mae Faurel
in
  1. Get Everything in Writing.
    No matter how much you want to believe a handshake or a promise, if it’s not written down, it doesn’t count.
  2. Narcissists Don’t Want Resolution – They Want Control.
    Stop trying to reason with people who feed on chaos. Their silence, confusion and mixed messages are the strategy.
  3. Executors Are Not Automatically Fair.
    Being named in a will doesn’t make someone ethical. Question authority when it feels wrong, even if it’s family.
  4. Residency Rights Can Be a Trap.
    It might sound like a kindness, but it can also be used to keep you tethered and quiet. Get legal clarity, even if you can’t afford a solicitor – look for free legal aid or housing rights groups.
  5. Protect Your Mental Space Like a Fortress.
    Screenshots, journals, voice notes – document your truth for your own sanity, not just legal backup. The gaslighting is real and it’s exhausting.
  6. The Law Isn’t Always Just – But Paper Trails Help.
    If you’re being shut out, ignored or manipulated, build a clean, factual paper trail. It’s your best shield if things go legal.
  7. You Are Not Overreacting.
    If you feel something’s off, it probably is. Trust that inner nudge – it’s trying to keep you safe.

Lesson of the Day: Politeness can be a prison.

I used to think being polite, holding my tongue, staying ‘civil’, avoiding conflict was the high road. But silence in the face of manipulation only empowers the manipulator. I wish I’d known that boundaries aren’t rude. They’re necessary. Being firm doesn’t make you unkind. It makes you free.

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Comments

6 responses to “What I Wish I Knew…”

  1. For Singles And Couples Avatar
    For Singles And Couples

    We truly are uniquely created individuals, sharing similar life experiences.
    Many of us have similar stories, some of us are balanced enough to say where we made a mistake, was too harsh, maybe a little impatient, and are humble enough to own up to our error and say sorry.
    For others, they continue being wrong and strong.
    Only concerned with their own narrative, unwilling and refusing to discuss anything with ‘all’ the affected parties.
    They prefer to hold their own counsel (usually among those just like them) who will agree with everything they say, without challenging them.

    Relatives and family can be the most difficult people to deal with.
    Your ‘must do’ list in this post is essential for dealing with them.

    Between 2020 and 2023 both of my parents and both of my wife’s parents, passed away.
    I have many a long story to share, some are not really mine to share, they’re lady G’s, but she can’t speak on things, just yet, as things are still going through process.
    Judging by your list above, I think you know what I mean.

    I can say that I’ve experienced the best and worst of people, who should know better.
    I have one maternal half sister, who is closer to me for a few reasons, more than my full sister.
    The rest of our 5 other siblings don’t speak to me, I tried one last time to communicate with them all last month.
    At least I have 1 of my siblings to converse with, my wife has 3 sisters (1 of which is a half sister and the eldest) and a brother, all older, but none of them are talking to her.
    They all believe they have a valid reason to behave the way they are, and refuse to see her side of things.
    You can imagine how difficult it makes things regarding the legal affairs.

    But as Lois has been saying recently, it’s hard to come to an agreement, and get any sense, from the village idiots.
    Other stories for other days…

    Thanks for sharing my dear.

    Look forward to seeing you round my place, and hearing from you, whether you agree with my points of view, or not.😇

    Much love.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Mae Faurel Avatar
      Mae Faurel

      Thank you so much for sharing all of that with me – it honestly means a lot. I’m so sorry you and your wife have had to go through so much loss in such a short space of time, and to have the added weight of family tensions on top of it… it’s a lot. And yes — I completely get what you mean about people choosing to stay in their own little echo chambers, holding tight to their version of events, while shutting everyone else out. It’s exhausting, and it hurts in ways people who haven’t lived it might never fully grasp.

      I’m glad you at least have that one sibling connection still, though I know it’s bittersweet. And poor Lady G – sending her strength for when she’s ready to speak her truth, because it’s so hard carrying that weight silently.

      Lois sounds like a woman after my own heart with that village idiots line – made me smile because sometimes, if we don’t laugh, we’ll cry. I’m grateful for your honesty and openness here, and yes – I’ll definitely drop by your place. Whether we agree or debate, it’s the realness that matters.

      Much love to you both ❤️

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
  2. utahan15 Avatar
    utahan15

    do not overthink

    terse tepid verse

    get to the point

    hush yell

    and sit down a spell

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Mae Faurel Avatar
      Mae Faurel

      Love this, short, sharp, and somehow still comforting. Feels like a gentle nudge to just be.🧡

      Like

      Reply
      1. utahan15 Avatar
        utahan15

        ease yourself and divine master to please.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Mae Faurel Avatar
        Mae Faurel

        A gentle reminder to let the universe do its part. Wise words!🙏

        Like

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